Are They Twins?

I've been reading a book that Sean bought me called "Ready or Not...Here We Come!" by Elizabeth Lyons. It's all about what you need to know to survive the first year with twins. It's hilarious. So far, my favorite chapter is the one about the weird, intrusive and just plain dumb questions you get from curious people (aka perfect strangers) when you are out and about with the babies.

I thought I'd share a few with you as I think it will give us all a good laugh. The funny thing is, some of my friends with twins have already warned me about some of these very questions. If you'd like, comment on what you think the answers to each should be (keep it clean as I have young readers).

1. Are they twins?
Hmmm, they look alike, are dressed alike and are about the same size. Wouldn't they have to be at least nine months apart to not be twins, and don't you think a baby at nine months looks a little different than a baby at three months?

2. What kind of fertility drugs did you take?
I'd love to share with you Sean's answer to this one but it isn't appropriate for all audiences. It's about as good as his little "pow, pow" comment at this year's Antle family reunion when we announced we were having twins. If your curiosity gets the best of you, email or call me and I'll share it privately (if you aren't young and innocent). I happen to LOVE the book's answer to this: "Excuse me. Did I ask you if you douche?" (If you are one of my young readers and don't know what that is, don't ask me, ask your mother.)

3. Did you know you were having twins?
My answer to this one: First, this is 2008 and there is this little thing called technology. Second, the fact that I was in maternity pants by my twelth week was a little tip that I either had one enormous baby or that I was blessed with two. But, if anyone really asks me this question, I'll smile politely and say "yes."

4. Wow, I'm sure glad it's you and not me!
Thanks for the encouragement. The book's suggested answer "Me too!" I think I'll stick with that one.

5. You aren't going to have any more, are you? Variation (and I've already gotten this one) Well, at least you get it over with all at one time.
I love how people think they have this insight into your life and you can't possibly know better than they do. Who said we weren't having any more? Let's get past this one and we'll go from there as it really could go either way. I'm the type that likes to have options.

6. Which one is smarter?
Really? I won't even dignify that with an answer.

7. Which side of your family do twins run?
I actually don't mind this question and I get it all the time. If I knew nothing about twins (which I didn't about five months ago), I would ask it too. So, here's a little science lesson for everyone just to explain. First, fraternal twins (which is what we are about 95% sure we have) come from two different fertilized eggs. I now know that as a woman ages, she is more likely to drop more than one ege during her cycle. This would have been nice to know years ago, but I still wouldn't change a thing. Identical twins come from one egg that splits and have nothing to do with genetics. According to the book I'm reading, an egg splitting is still considered a purely random act (I like to call it God as I don't believe in anything random when it comes to creation.) So, twins actually only "run" on the mother's side because only the mother passes the tendency to release more than one egg to her daughter. I will be sharing this little known secret with my daughter if I ever have one.

I plan to keep track of all of the amusing questions I get over the next year or two. I'll let you know what makes the list!